I'm sitting on my own on a large rocky plateau that rises above the water of the river. The water level is low and much of the sand bed can be seen. We have already crossed this river, the Black Umfelozi, a couple of times, and the water did not reach beyond our knees. About ten meters below me, the water flows slowly along the rock wall, where for many thousands of years it has worn away a good part of the rock wall so that I feel as if I am floating above the river. The sun is already quite low, it should be like this around the clock of four. We do not have time with us, so I make the estimate of time from what nature has to offer. The glare of the sunlight in the water shows a symphony of beautiful patterns partly due to the gentle wind that blows in gusts over the water. In the middle of this glare, I suddenly see a spherical phenomenon rising above the water with a small sphere just in front of it. Then it disappears again to reappear a little later, now closer. It's moving my way. The third time I see it. It's a whopper of a turtle. It swims quietly under my rock; he and I can be there.
I have been there for a long time and am completely surrounded by nature, I feel myself slowly becoming one with nature. A feeling of special alertness and at the same time deep peace grows in me. It sounds so paradoxical: that alertness, in which all my senses are open and I am fully present in the moment of this moment and perceive everything, and at the same time there is that complete calm and peace within me. But still, it is possible, I experience it: this is life in the now. Is this not the Supreme sense of happiness?
I have been banned for a few days as a trail facilitator with six beautiful guys from the Netherlands and two great South African guides in the bush of Umfelozi , a wildlife reserve that has been preserved in its original state. There is in no way anything of Western culture to be detected here, there are no cars , there are no people, there are no lodges, none of that, this is still pure wilderness. It is as it has been for millions of years, with all the flora and fauna. You feel that we as humans originally come from here. We experience this primal feeling more and more when we are there. We walk with our backpacks through that nature, also realizing that we are guests here. Not only to enjoy but also for our own safety, we have become more and more aware to be present with full attention and we do everything to disturb nature as little as possible. That respect is also felt by the other inhabitants and therefore we are tolerated and respected by nature. After all, we sleep in the open air, without a tent and without any protection, except for our own attentiveness. Actually, we're banishing right through their backyard. And that is the garden of elephants, lions, Buffaloes, rhinos, baboons, wildebeest, impala, and so on. What would we think if they just came to poke around in our backyard? Attention and respect is in order.
What is the basic idea now?
The wilderness consists of only "fundamental" structures that are far removed from the "made" structures such as those created by man. When I am now enclosed by those’ fundamental ‘structures, i.e. in the wilderness in Africa, I experience that my own’ fundamental ' structures (my essence, my being), which I already had when I was born, are addressed and emerge. I'm reminded. This is sometimes accompanied by deep emotions. Through the all-emphatic presence of the purity of nature, my hidden ‘fundamental’ structures break through, as it were, my own ‘made’ structures (my ego, my roles). I then stand in my nakedness before nature.
On the rocky plateau I sit for a long time, while at the same time it seems as if it is so over, I have no sense of time. There is only natural time or inner time here. This is the ultimate rest, here peace reigns in all beauty. The world may be on fire, but here everything goes as it has for centuries according to the laws of nature. Nine's perturbation, everything is right, it is as it is. I feel one with the whole and that feeling really flows in me. It feeds deep within me my Anchorage , my resting place, a fixed place from which everything Springs. There is the source of my lust for life and wisdom that is now fed from all sides by the whole of the wilderness. I can go back to this when I'm back in that hectic world full of ‘made’ structures. Then that place offers me the peace and quiet to view, approach and solve a situation with responsibility.
In the distance, an elephant steps into the river. This is accompanied by large amounts of high splashing water, which is a magnificent sight against the already low and reflecting sunlight in the water. What an explosion of power and presence. Then he disappears among the reeds on the other side, only to appear a little later, not audible, just in front of me on the other side of the river, gently step by step. There he radiates tremendous wisdom. The softness and care with which every step is taken is a fascinating sight. This touches my heart and tears fill my eyes.
Deep within me at that moment comes the insight that in essence life is about wisdom, softness and strength. Wisdom for giving one's full attention and attaining insight, gentleness for respecting and compassionating the other, and strength to be and act when necessary.
By observing this beautiful elephant in silence, I really see the’ fundamental ' structures, or perhaps they are energy fields, of the wilderness and of the wilderness within myself. It forms my internal foundation and the deep reflection with my self gives me this beautiful insight into all its simplicity. An insight that I will forever hold with me and cherish.
Boy Van Droffelaar, PhD
